PENNY WASSMAN

Needs (or values) are the heart of NVC. When we are able to identify needs instead of blaming ourselves or other people, we are able to contribute to harmony, peace and connection in the world. Some examples of needs are: Understanding, consideration, communication, safety, shelter, clarity, honesty, reliability, inclusion, choice, stimulation, beauty, freedom, meaning, community, friendship, family, love, ease, peace, support, rest, mutuality, creativity, purpose, order, respect, trust, creativity, authenticity, companionship, integrity, and play... (i) A common habit is to follow the words "I feel" with words such as "like", "that", or "as if", or a personal pronoun such as "you", "she", "he", or "they", or names or nouns referring to people. When we do this, we are not expressing feelings. Instead, we are expressing thoughts. By noticing such phrases and taking the time to process underlying feelings, we assist our communication and our understanding... When we use language or..